I’m Sure i Can but i Know i Can’t

I’m Sure I Can but I Know I Can’t

For the second morning now I wake up to the most beautiful sound of the pitter patter of gentle rain drops. Fresh rain bringing life to my garden it is as if I can almost feel the garden growing. Ange sleeps warmly in bed as I leave her I tuck her in and kiss her on the cheek I step outside sit on the patio and I just watch, hear and smell the fresh rain falling. As I sit in the lounge with the door open the light begins to come to my party I am alive this is awesome.

One of my all-time favorite places to be when it rains is on the farm in the Lowveld bush. I am not there now but I will be next week so sitting amongst my garden right now is just fine. As I move inside I leave the door open I will continue writing on my book- From TBI to NYC as the rain falls-

Wait a minute something about this picture is not right. I stand up and walk outside I want to know if I actually did smell the rain. I thought I did because I started writing about it. Nope now there is nothing no smell at all what is going on then why?

After my last evaluation I had extensive tests done in relation to my taste and smell there was nothing. This was three odd years after my accident and still nothing it is now four and a half years. The neuro specialists told me that if you do not smell or taste after two years you can kiss those senses goodbye. The neuro surgeon said that it is your memory telling you about the different tastes and smells. It is just memory Bevan just memory your taste and smell is gone. If you see it your memory tells you how it smelt or tasted like.

Oh well nothing I can do about it now but I can believe I can I’m sure I can but I know I can’t. I do know I am alive besides I have other ways of smelling-memory allows me to smell I will take that and I will enjoy hearing the pitter patter so much more.

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