Emotions-Like Sadness Maybe

Emotions-Like Sadness Maybe

Last year my mom passed away-she decided it was indeed her time to go and find her next port-of-call, her next adventure, her next life to live. I can remember sitting in the church not what was said or who all was there just being there. I do remember seeing my two kids walk up onto the elevated section and standing in front of all to say a few words about my mom. Everyone in the church shed tears, I heard them sniffing and I know now they were filled with sadness about my mom leaving us.

However for me there were no emotions no sadness no emptiness not realizing that I will ever see my dear mom again. Now though after Anges dad left us I have discovered an emotion that of sadness. I did not cry the day he died only the following day once we went back to his home to sort out a few issues. As I stepped into his garage which is filled with his work I realized he was not there anymore and then it hit me that feeling that there is something not right here something is missing. For the first time now I feel sadness which belongs to an extremely down moment.

Julian was missing his smile of seeing Ange walk in to visit is no longer there. Yesterday when my daughter called Ange to send a word I cried-not for long but I cried and I felt emotional-sadness. This morning when I woke I was sad and I cried again.

I should not be happy that for the first time I am feeling emotional because of a special person passing away but I am. So I will remember that great smile of that hard man as Ange walks in to his home and I shall remember that it is because of him that I have been given back one of my emotions. Once again I say thank you to you Jules.

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