Difficult times Make Me Stronger

Difficult Times Make Me Stronger

Today I was up early before the sun rose to get to the SASSA office to collect my gold card again. They had sent us a message saying I should collect it after initially my application was denied. I get into the office and I am sent to a specific queue. I wait and wait after a while I am sitting behind the lady as she goes into my file. Awesome I think I have got this but soon after this positive thought the lady tells me my claim has been denied… again. Why I ask? Well bla, bla, bla she says but anyway go sit in that queue they might be able to explain the reason for this and why I was sent an SMS to say I should come to collect.

Okay disappointed I walk over to the other queue which is now over fifty long. I sit and wait not moving a baby next to me is now beyond crying I am once again in a difficult place. I think get up and leave as my battery is now beeping and my atom bombs are loading. No I tell myself just hang in there I can get through this but then the shrivelled lady next to me decides to quieten her child and pulls out her even more shriveled up booby feeding time is now.

Hanging and almost touching her knees she yanks it into the baby’s mouth but it misses the target and I get the first squirt. Breath Bevan, breath after a while the baby is gurgling and I get more of the mother’s milk which my body does not really require.

Not a fuck I just can’t anymore I have been patient and I have been sympathetic. I stand up greet all goodbye and leave. I get home I am disappointed and feeling down-fuck, fuck, fuckedy fuck, fuck. I turn on the music channel my all-time favorite artist David Bowie sends out sweet lyrics.

I now calm down and all is just fine Bowie has passed on but his spirit is alive. I am alive and I have so much more I want to do. My life may be difficult and have many challengers but I love life and I am happy. Soon after I am relaxed, I am now working on my bracelets and I close the superglue with my mouth. Oh fuck I hope I don’t get a call now as I cannot open my mouth. Maybe this is a good time to not talk.

Whatever shitty situation you may find yourself in it is okay get over it move on and enjoy life.

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