I Not a Child.

Shhh Quiet

 I know a TBI is not easy on others especially my beautiful wife Ange. Most days because of other people and issues I almost break her. This in my mind is because Ange and I are so close and she just tries to protect me. I wonder though how many times Ange has to tell others ‘you do know you should not talk to him like that’. I have issues I know but I am not a child and if you treat me as a child I can only take so much. Eventually when that time comes the dragon is unleashed and then the shit hits the fan…properly. Ange is once again in the middle and takes the brunt of my atom bomb.

I do not think I am wrong, treating anybody as a child and they too will react. I can see how hard it is on Ange and I am so sorry for this. A great lady sat me down a while ago and spoke to me about other people’s understanding of our injury. They just do not understand it and generally their reaction is shh he has damaged his brain. We have to be stronger than they are and understand that it is difficult for them to understand our injury. I get it but if someone is around you all the time I would think they should  understand me better and know that you do not have to tiptoe around me.

I am not slipping down into a depressed state I have just had enough of having to apologies to people that know of my injury. I will not be looked at as a child that knows nothing. I believe I actually know so much more than what others know yes the material pieces of our world do challenge me but I always find a way. if I do make a mistake then you know what I will learn from that mistake. Is that not what life is about. I will not be depressed or sulk for weeks or not be part of life, I will not be tired the whole weekend, I will not I follow others that are fading away instead of enjoying the greatness of life. I will enjoy each day I can and I will treat my wife as best as I can always. This point in my life there are many challenges and my wife does not need further shit falling on her shoulders. Soon I will have some closure and earn a salary then I can contribute and treat my wife as I should. For now though we must just stay strong soon we will get this weight off our shoulders. Soon now soon Ange.

Thank you for putting up with my shit and thank you for all you do for me.

I love you so very much.

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