My Beautiful Ange

My Beautiful Ange

Ange this post is just for you. As you left this morning to get to work you were late and had to rush off, you were late for it was me that made you late. Once again for the umpteenth time you would leave our home with a heavy heart you would leave me here not knowing what tomorrow is going to bring. What surprise would your husband now come up with to unsettle you once again? I am so sorry for all the weight I bring down on your shoulders; I am so sorry that you bear the brunt of all my mistakes and my no filter mouth. The words that come from me are not to harm you or anybody else they just appear.

My TBI is hard, but the fact is that TBI has changed me, I do not mean to harm anyone I do know I just talk how I see things and although I should rather just not speak my brain does not allow me to not say whatever it is I am thinking. I do know that I need to listen to you more please know that I am trying my best to be my best. I often do not thank you for all you do for me, all the time you have to now focus on my issues instead of ordinary issues for you is difficult, testing and tiring. All the great things you continuously do for me is from your heart with love and yet I cannot return all your greatness you hand out to me. I cannot give back to you what you give to me although I want so much to but I cannot I guess it is what it is and it is sad.

The weekends we share together are awesome and it is time for you to relax and just let your hair down but right next to you is TBI this unpleasant giant which just takes control and tends to ruin all that you do for me. In a few months we will be off to New York City where you and I will try to enjoy our time away but I do know that it will not be easy and that for you it will be hard work. Maybe just maybe you will be able to take off the caregiver hat and be my wife and enjoy one day there with me as your love.

I am so sorry for all the stress I give you unintentionally but just know that I am so proud of how you have taken this on and do so well in everything you do. Thank you Ange, I love you so very much.

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